Glee on the Rocks: S5E5 - It's Got Bette Midler

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Sorry, I'm so salty towards them
today.

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I don't know why I think this, I
was just annoyed having to watch

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this episode.
You're listening to Glee on the

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Rocks.
Hello.

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Welcome back to Glee on the
Rocks.

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I am Emily.
And I'm Mandy.

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And this is season five, episode
5, the end of Twerk.

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Yeah, yeah.
It's another in this little line

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of episodes that's a little.
Weird.

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Definitely weird.
Yeah, I think I blocked a lot of

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this out of my memory just
because I was like this is not

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something I need any recall for.
No, I mean, this is, this is

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like a standard Glee episode
where there's a really stupid

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plot line of kids twerking
coupled with like a really

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emotional plot line of someone
wanting to use the bathroom that

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aligns with their gender
identity and.

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It's it's very Ryan Murphy to
combine those things.

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Just staple of a Ryan Murphy
show to combine those things.

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But it is boring when I've been
in the world of not watching

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that for a while.
Yeah, it's.

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It's like pure candy puff Glee.
Yeah.

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You're like, yeah, let's combine
these two things together and

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and somehow pretend like they're
on equal footing and.

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Then throw some controversial
songs in there, too.

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Oh God, yeah, yeah, I guess
we'll we'll talk about that when

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we get there.
Yeah, so the the breakdown is

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the Glee club learns to learns
the dance of the hour, which is

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also inappropriate.
As if people haven't been

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twerking for fucking.
Meanwhile, Meanwhile, Marley

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discovers Jake's relationship
with Bree, and Rachel strides to

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convince Kurt that they should
both get tattoos because New

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York needed a storyline.
They could have been left out of

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this.
I think they should have been

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left out of this.
Yes they didn't need like.

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I would have preferred more time
spent on not the Tareq

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storyline, but at least maybe
unique storyline.

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Yes, New York.
We didn't need New York this

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time.
Like so sorry, Curt and Rachel,

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but like, you were not integral
to this episode.

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You didn't need to be here.
This is one of those like Lima.

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OH, only episodes.
I mean they clearly felt they

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didn't need Santana in it since
she doesn't appear at all.

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No Santana, no star child, no
Danny, no new band.

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Just two idiots, some him
wrangling tattoos and wigs, so I

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guess we'll get to them at some
point.

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So this episode opens with
Blaine putting the choir room

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chairs away while dancing his
little butt off to a song called

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Came to Party by the Canary
Diamonds.

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Let this man throw it back in
peace.

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Yeah.
Like he is having a great time

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and Tina has to fucking record
him like an asshole.

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Justice for Blaine and his
twerking.

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Like he's just having a
delightful time cleaning up the

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choir room, which no one else is
helping him do.

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That's true.
Why, why, Why is it falling on

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him?
But like one why are you

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recording him?
I'm so tired of people being

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recorded without their consent
in public.

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Though I guess if we're talking
about things Tina has done

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without consent to blame, maybe
that's a little on the list.

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Yeah, Tina, she's this man
alone.

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Give him his bodily autonomy.
Good.

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Lord, and I mean, I'm going to
come back to this at some point.

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I I'm going to have to say like
nice things about Darren Criss

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in this episode.
Yeah, which I don't enjoy

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always, but he is a good dancer.
He is, yeah.

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Whether or not he's a, I don't
know what the steps to twerking

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are, I'm not going to pretend to
know how to do it.

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Is this correct?
Twerking?

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I don't know.
Whatever he's he's a good

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dancer.
He's incredibly flexible.

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He moves very well.
He's he's got the right level of

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confidence in what he's doing,
whether it's technically correct

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or not.
He sells it like he's having fun

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doing it.
Yes he does.

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He gets low very easily for a
dude.

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I mean, I guess he doesn't have
far to go to get to the ground,

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but you know, he he moves well,
it's great.

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He seems to have a good time
doing it.

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He does it throughout the
episode and frankly he looks

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great in tight pair of pants.
So like, yeah, there's not a lot

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to complain about when he's
dancing.

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And later on near the end of the
episode when they're doing the

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different kinds of dance, a
little history dance and they're

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doing like the Mashed potato,
like clearly he can do different

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styles.
He's he's, he's.

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Pretty good.
He's good at it and we hate to

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say nice things, but he is a
good dancer.

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So.
But Tina has recorded him like

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an asshole and then has chosen
to show the rest of the Glee

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club, which embarrasses the fuck
out of Blaine for his twerk

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fail.
Gawker Nightmare Shoe, however,

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is riveted by a video of a
teenage boy dancing.

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Oh shoe, be less creepy.
Be less creepy, please.

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Like did not need any of that,
no.

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And he's like, this is what I
want from the judges at

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nationals to like one up throat
explosion.

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They need to edge up our shit
with teenagers twerking on

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stage.
Like no.

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Like counterpoint, you don't
need to do that.

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Counterpoint, none of this needs
to happen, no whatsoever.

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And Marley is clearly like, what
if some of us don't know how to

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twerk?
So they're going to, they're

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going to have a twerk Toriel.
They really are in this season.

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I forgot how much they drive
home Marley's pureness and

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innocence.
Yes, sweet, sweet.

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Marley recurring theme.
It is as if she hasn't had

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enough to deal with and I know
on this show now she's just

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like.
Like.

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Trad wifing it up.
Let her, let her have a little

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more personality.
I know, and I like Marley.

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Yeah, and that's I think that's
why I keep noticing it.

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I'm like, oh, this is like this
is not a character.

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Beats that I would generally
like, but I still like her as a

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character, which is, I said,
something about the acting

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maybe.
Yeah, definitely.

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And she like it's such a weird.
I don't think it's a compliment.

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I don't know.
But her like her face goes with

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it.
Yeah, like you totally buy.

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Yeah.
That Melissa fits this moment of

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hey, maybe like I don't feel
like twerking on stage and maybe

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I don't feel like putting on a
Lady Gaga skin suit.

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Like I don't.
Maybe I just want to like sing

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and dance for the choir.
Like can't we just do that and

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not?
Not in Mr. Shoes Glee Club.

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It's 40 year old man, so yeah.
So Jake and Kitty are going to

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hold a twerk toriel to teach
these kiddos how to.

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How many times are we going to
have to say twerk?

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Let's just try to keep it to a
minimum of a couple of dozen.

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OK, we're going to try.
I don't know why Blaine is in

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this class when he already got
an A.

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Yeah, yeah, he could have sat
that one out.

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He didn't need to be there.
Could have Facetimed his fiance

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for a while.
Right, He's got other things to

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do.
He could maybe go to a real

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class so that he can graduate.
No, they they were just going to

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keep him there forever.
He didn't.

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He didn't need this.
He already got it.

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But Sue obviously is watching
from afar because there needs to

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be a plot and a villain and some
tension around this dancing.

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As if they haven't done
inappropriate dancing on Glee

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before.
Pretty often.

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Like we've had them get in
trouble for doing inappropriate

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dancing on stage before, yeah.
We really like this is well into

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the point where they were just
recycling different beats.

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Yeah.
Like different character arcs.

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Probably because they forgot
they'd already done it.

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Yeah, I probably, yeah.
Not their strongest point, It's.

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It really never has been,
although once in a while they

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bring something up.
You're like, oh, you remembered

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what you did.
I'm so proud of you.

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Good job.
Yeah.

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So we've our our other.
I think we should just skip New

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York and then just come back to
it at the end.

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Yeah, we can do that.
OK, so our other main storyline

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here is unique and she needs to
use the restroom and opts for

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the women's restroom, which
fine, but runs into Bree who

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just seems to lurk everywhere at
all times.

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Really not not not a fan of
Bree?

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No, I really dislike this
character.

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It's not a fun villain
character, no.

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It's really bad, yeah.
Is it this?

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It's not this moment.
It comes later where Bree says

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has like a a rant.
I think, oh, it's the rant to

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Marley later that when Bree
confronts Marley about Jake then

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I'm like, this isn't even
interesting.

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It's just mean.
Yeah, it's just mean.

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That's that's really it.
Like Santana was mean but

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interesting.
Even Kitty.

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Yeah, it's.
Funny like, I mean, I I don't, I

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mean Kitty was, I think a step
down from Santana, but Kitty

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still had like some humor to it,
whereas Bree is just like one

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note cruelty.
Every Xerox copy of Santana is

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worse, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, it really is.

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Why stop remaking this
character?

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Santana was perfect.
You don't.

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Every time you make a new one,
it's bad.

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It's like they're changing the
wrong things to try and

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differentiate.
Mm, Hmm.

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And they never.
They keep trying to recreate

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Santana, and they can't do it.
So Bree confronts Unique about

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using the women's restroom, and
Unique confesses that she's

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afraid to use the boys room at
school.

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And Bree's like, your secret is
safe with me.

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Like, obviously it's not.
Have they not learned that Bree

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sucks?
Yeah.

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They shouldn't know that by now.
We know you should know.

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They're kind of stupid.
Just don't say any.

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Actually, if you saw Bree just
turn around and leave, she'd be

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like whoops, gotta go by E
Actually, I didn't need to use

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the bathroom by E, but this
turns into the great McKinley

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bathroom gender riot of 2013.
But it's not.

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And, and this is actually kind
of I, it's not interesting, but

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like Unique says this as a voice
over which this doesn't actually

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happen that often where Unique
is like talking to the audience.

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Yeah, yeah, you're right.
She's like narrating this to the

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audience because she's not
talking to anybody else.

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It's like the hallway voice over
from the first season.

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Yeah, yeah.
No, that's exactly what it is.

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And they really don't like.
I didn't realize how they

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dropped that.
Yeah, it just comes back for

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this for OK, cool, but it's a
little jarring I.

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Feel like Britney might have had
a few moments.

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Yeah, I think so.
Yeah.

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But it they haven't done this in
quite some time.

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But this isn't like a gender
riot.

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It's Bree goes to make out with
Jake in the men's room, causing

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00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:55,560
Stoner Brett to use the girls
room because it's cleaner.

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And then the girls want to use
the boys room because they don't

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want to wait in line.
That's not a gender riot.

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00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:03,880
That's just like.
Not yeah.

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Students being weird.
Also just maybe a sign that you

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need gender neutral restrooms?
Yeah.

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00:13:09,840 --> 00:13:12,600
Or like, clean them more often,
Yeah.

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00:13:12,840 --> 00:13:17,760
Or that yeah, like.
Maybe up your cleaning rotations

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00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:21,400
here.
So this is an interesting

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storyline because this is stuff
that actually happens, like

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students wanting to use the
bathroom that corresponds to

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their gender identity.
Interesting storyline.

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Totally, absolutely relevant
today, right?

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Yeah, I mean, I was a little bit
surprised.

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00:13:36,240 --> 00:13:39,680
I mean like obviously I'm
familiar with Glee doing the

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00:13:39,680 --> 00:13:43,880
unique storyline, but so many
other parts of Glee feel kind of

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dated and I was like, this feels
like a now topic.

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Yeah, totally.
It's it's a now topic and

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somehow it's gotten worse.
Like the the problem that they

227
00:13:57,000 --> 00:14:00,640
were discussing is worse.
It hasn't gotten better.

228
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:05,840
Sorry, Kurt to your tattoo, but
it it did not get it did not get

229
00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:10,720
Bette Midler.
Yeah, so we also have Sue's

230
00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:16,920
Corner as our our villain arc.
And I guess Sue's Corner is one

231
00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:19,800
of our recurring themes that do
happen to come back.

232
00:14:20,240 --> 00:14:23,920
But she wants to discuss the
nation's insidious foe, Miley

233
00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:28,480
Cyrus and twerking.
And for anyone re watching the

234
00:14:28,480 --> 00:14:31,800
show or maybe watching it for
some reason for the first time

235
00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:37,320
in 2024, if you weren't around
for Miley Cyrus dancing with

236
00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:41,520
Robin Thicke at the VM as this
doesn't make any sense.

237
00:14:42,560 --> 00:14:44,080
This is the dated reference
where.

238
00:14:44,080 --> 00:14:45,600
You're like.
What are you talking about?

239
00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:49,240
It's definitely like very dated.
Yeah.

240
00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:52,760
Like Glee sometimes can capture
a little bit of a timeless feel

241
00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:55,240
because the music isn't always
new.

242
00:14:55,320 --> 00:14:58,640
But this, yeah, this, this
storyline, No, this is

243
00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:02,880
transported back in time.
Like when people were mad at

244
00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:09,400
Miley Cyrus, like, oh, OK, so
Sue wants to end the pandemic.

245
00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:10,920
And I was like, no, don't say
that word.

246
00:15:10,920 --> 00:15:16,160
Oh yeah.
By outlawing it at McKinley,

247
00:15:16,720 --> 00:15:19,960
because whenever she makes a big
proclamation, it's definitely

248
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,400
going to go well.
Oh yeah.

249
00:15:22,160 --> 00:15:26,320
So the Glee club is pissed about
this because they it's their

250
00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:29,880
God-given right to twerk, a
thing that they have never done

251
00:15:31,320 --> 00:15:34,520
as a Glee club, but now?
Still can't even do.

252
00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:36,760
They're literally trying to
learn how to.

253
00:15:36,760 --> 00:15:39,040
Do it.
They're trying so hard.

254
00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:43,600
This thing that they've never
done for their competitions will

255
00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:47,840
never do again.
But it is so important to them

256
00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:52,800
right now.
And will goes who someone goes

257
00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:56,680
on this rant about like twerking
is about blurring lines.

258
00:15:56,720 --> 00:16:01,720
It's just a speech that will cue
Will Schuster into singing

259
00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:05,840
Blurred Lines.
Which didn't need to happen.

260
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:08,800
This didn't need to happen.
This song is so gross.

261
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:13,160
Robin Thicke is so gross.
Like including this in the

262
00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:19,760
episode is blah.
Yeah, I like, I skipped it.

263
00:16:19,880 --> 00:16:22,640
I mean, I've heard it before.
Yeah, I saw.

264
00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:25,800
I, I was, I was there.
I was there when it was written.

265
00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:28,160
I was there.
I I saw this when it happened.

266
00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:30,720
Yeah, I don't need that that.
Song.

267
00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:34,360
In my head again, because it is
an earworm and I fucking hate

268
00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:37,240
it.
It is, yes.

269
00:16:37,840 --> 00:16:40,160
It has been a while since Mr.
Shuster had a song.

270
00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:42,440
That's true.
Yeah.

271
00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:49,360
We had peace for a while.
We knew peace and honestly I was

272
00:16:49,360 --> 00:16:52,440
kind of with Sue on this one.
I was like, this is honestly

273
00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:55,200
very disruptive for the school
to have these idiots running

274
00:16:55,200 --> 00:16:59,640
around into the classrooms.
I mean, Sue makes some points

275
00:16:59,640 --> 00:17:01,600
sometimes.
Like this is a place of

276
00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:03,880
learning, not a place of dancing
and.

277
00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:05,599
Twerking is it?
Is it a place of learning for

278
00:17:05,599 --> 00:17:07,839
any of them?
No, I think their SAD scores

279
00:17:07,839 --> 00:17:09,560
have got to be the lowest in the
country.

280
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:13,880
Absolutely.
The feds are about to roll in

281
00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:19,440
and take over and Sue rightfully
calls the song out for being

282
00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:22,319
about date rape.
Like this is not an appropriate

283
00:17:22,520 --> 00:17:23,880
song.
It's a bad song.

284
00:17:24,319 --> 00:17:27,640
Yeah, it's, it's like, I like
the the bit of acknowledgement

285
00:17:27,640 --> 00:17:30,200
from the show, the Oh yeah, we
actually know what this is

286
00:17:30,200 --> 00:17:32,560
about, but we're gonna have
these teenagers like.

287
00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:36,440
We know it's a bad song.
We're gonna do it anyway, like,

288
00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:38,800
but you don't have to.
You don't have.

289
00:17:38,840 --> 00:17:42,480
There's so many other songs.
Just because Miley Cyrus danced

290
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:47,080
to this song at the VMAs and
you're doing an episode about

291
00:17:47,080 --> 00:17:50,560
like you don't, you could still
twerk to a different song?

292
00:17:50,560 --> 00:17:53,280
Yeah, there are like so many
songs you could twerk to.

293
00:17:54,120 --> 00:17:58,640
Like you any like anything,
anything I.

294
00:17:59,560 --> 00:18:01,240
Mean you know Blaine has a
playlist.

295
00:18:01,520 --> 00:18:03,720
Blaine has got a bootylicious.
Playlist.

296
00:18:03,760 --> 00:18:06,440
Absolutely.
Blaine has an entire he He is

297
00:18:06,440 --> 00:18:10,920
ready to go.
He's been waiting months for

298
00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:13,880
this to come up.
He's been stretching.

299
00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:17,560
He's got stretchy pants just for
this.

300
00:18:17,560 --> 00:18:19,840
Because those, you know, if he
were trying to do this in jeans,

301
00:18:19,840 --> 00:18:20,920
it would never happen.
No.

302
00:18:23,480 --> 00:18:25,800
But yeah.
And Sue tries to fire him

303
00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:28,720
because she's always trying to
fire him.

304
00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:30,560
Except when they're friends for,
like, an episode.

305
00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:33,840
And then they go back to being
enemies, because the Glee club

306
00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:37,560
needs an enemy to survive.
And they, they are.

307
00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:42,520
I mean, to be fair, I guess if I
had Jane Lynch as an enemy, like

308
00:18:42,880 --> 00:18:44,760
acting it, I would want to milk
that too.

309
00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:46,400
Oh, totally.
Yeah, they could.

310
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:52,200
Just leave them enemies.
I know, I mean if I were ever.

311
00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:55,880
I mean I'm more into Shu and Soo
as enemies to lovers.

312
00:18:57,920 --> 00:19:02,320
Oh.
So so we've you know, we have to

313
00:19:02,320 --> 00:19:05,560
go back to unique storyline
because this episode bounces

314
00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:08,480
around these three.
We have twerking, we have New

315
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:15,200
York and we have unique.
One of them is very private and

316
00:19:15,200 --> 00:19:19,200
personal and sad and like
important, and the other two are

317
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:23,520
silly and it's your good old
classic Glee episode sandwiching

318
00:19:23,520 --> 00:19:25,640
an important storyline between
nonsense some.

319
00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:29,040
Emotional whiplash and music.
Yeah, it's great.

320
00:19:29,320 --> 00:19:31,920
Yeah.
So unique goes to use this time.

321
00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:35,360
She's going to use the men's
room because she's getting told

322
00:19:35,360 --> 00:19:39,000
off from the women's room and of
course gets bullied by a bunch

323
00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:45,880
of dudes who are there who are
just being absolute garbage.

324
00:19:46,680 --> 00:19:49,800
Not sure if these were football
or whatever.

325
00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:51,640
Doesn't actually matter what
they're all like wearing

326
00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:54,560
Letterman jackets.
Finn Hudson would not have put

327
00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:57,000
up with this.
No season one.

328
00:19:57,600 --> 00:20:00,480
Season one probably would have
just looked the other way, yeah.

329
00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:03,400
Past that, no.
Yeah, would not have.

330
00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:07,400
But this, this cues up our
second song of the episode,

331
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:19,880
which is If I Were a Boy.
If I were a boy, I think I could

332
00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:28,040
understand how it feels to every
girl.

333
00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:40,240
I swear I'd be a better man,
which does makes sense for the

334
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:41,840
show.
Yeah, it does, yeah.

335
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:45,840
It's like a nice, accurate song.
I, I, I feel like the accuracy

336
00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:47,120
is good.
It's not, it's not my favorite

337
00:20:47,120 --> 00:20:49,520
song, but the the emotional
impact, they get points for

338
00:20:49,520 --> 00:20:51,200
that.
Yeah, it's like, oh, this one.

339
00:20:51,360 --> 00:20:52,600
It fits.
Yeah, this one.

340
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:53,920
Fits.
I love it.

341
00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:57,120
And I did.
Like when she goes back to the

342
00:20:57,120 --> 00:21:00,240
choir room, Jake, Writer and Sam
are going to go kick ass.

343
00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:04,040
Yeah, but rightfully unique is
like, that's not going to fix

344
00:21:04,040 --> 00:21:08,520
anything.
Like, it's a systemic problem to

345
00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:13,280
to solve this.
And there's so there's like a, a

346
00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:18,960
McKinley school board meeting.
And so one, the joke of it opens

347
00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:21,840
with the motion approved to dig
up the school parking lot and

348
00:21:21,840 --> 00:21:24,680
move the Indian bones.
Incredible.

349
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:28,440
Yeah.
I did think this was gonna the

350
00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:31,880
school board meeting was gonna
include the bathroom situation,

351
00:21:31,880 --> 00:21:35,800
and it's not.
It's simply Schuster protesting

352
00:21:35,880 --> 00:21:39,840
the twerking ban.
You would think that maybe one

353
00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:43,480
of those would be equally as
important as the other in the

354
00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:45,120
eyes of the school board, but
no.

355
00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:47,080
I was like, oh, we're going to
talk about the the bathroom

356
00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:49,120
situation at the school board.
That's going to be kind of

357
00:21:49,120 --> 00:21:52,240
fraught and interesting.
Like, no, it's just the the

358
00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:55,160
twerking band.
The second joke that came really

359
00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:56,720
quickly was.
Teacher of the.

360
00:21:56,800 --> 00:21:59,280
Year What is this?
A typo.

361
00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:02,320
William Schuster.
Incredible.

362
00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:07,080
But Will is there to protest and
they run through different types

363
00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:11,440
of controversial dances at the
time, the waltz, jazz, Elvis,

364
00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:15,040
the twist and the kids get to do
little dances and I thought that

365
00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:20,240
was cute.
But then we have to go back to

366
00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:24,560
the bathroom where Unique has
requested a unisex bathroom,

367
00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:27,600
which, OK, great unisex
bathrooms.

368
00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:33,080
We all use them all over the
place in airplanes and all sorts

369
00:22:33,080 --> 00:22:34,880
of situations.
In your home.

370
00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:37,240
Your home.
Your home is a unisex bathroom.

371
00:22:37,240 --> 00:22:43,320
Yeah, it's not that hard.
Sue grants this request by

372
00:22:43,320 --> 00:22:47,880
installing a purple porta potty
bolted to the choir choir room.

373
00:22:47,880 --> 00:22:51,040
Floor.
That kind of made me laugh.

374
00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:54,240
It made me laugh.
Also, Tina immediately using it,

375
00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:56,600
Yeah.
Yeah.

376
00:22:57,280 --> 00:22:59,960
I was like, all right.
That was that was a good one.

377
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:02,920
She's like, it's not that bad.
Like you got me.

378
00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:04,280
That was.
That's so stupid.

379
00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:05,280
You got me.
Yeah.

380
00:23:05,280 --> 00:23:06,960
I hate this show.
Yeah.

381
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:13,080
Why is this funny?
Who did this and why am I

382
00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:16,400
laughing?
You, Ryan Murphy?

383
00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:18,640
Yeah, fuck you.
When you get it wrong and when

384
00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:20,800
you get it right.
Yep, Yep.

385
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:22,760
I don't actually know who wrote
this episode.

386
00:23:22,760 --> 00:23:26,000
I'm just in a cursing out Ryan
mood apparently.

387
00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:30,400
I wonder if he even saw these
episodes by this point in the

388
00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:31,120
5th.
Season.

389
00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:33,400
Probably not.
This one was he.

390
00:23:34,720 --> 00:23:39,200
Was well on to season 73 of
American Horror Story by Dan

391
00:23:39,200 --> 00:23:42,040
Lesney.
Probably this one was written.

392
00:23:42,360 --> 00:23:44,760
The credit goes to Michael
Hitchcock.

393
00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:49,600
OK.
So he did Big Brother, he did

394
00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:52,360
MASH off the role.
You were born to play girls and

395
00:23:52,360 --> 00:23:55,040
boys on film.
I mean some of those.

396
00:23:55,880 --> 00:23:57,400
He seems like a bit of a mixed
bag.

397
00:23:57,760 --> 00:23:59,280
Yeah.
'Cause yeah, I don't know.

398
00:23:59,280 --> 00:24:01,120
I I feel like there are
definitely points of this

399
00:24:01,120 --> 00:24:05,760
episode that are good but not, I
don't know, not put together the

400
00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:08,840
best way.
I know it's just, yeah, I know,

401
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:14,320
'cause we ought 'cause then we
have to go to Marley, who's

402
00:24:14,320 --> 00:24:19,640
confronted by Bree, showing her
a vine, rip vine of her.

403
00:24:20,320 --> 00:24:22,880
Another throwback.
I know of her dancing during

404
00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:26,120
Blurred Lines.
Just to be a bitch like this is

405
00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:34,320
just simply to be an asshole,
and it's like mocking her dance

406
00:24:34,320 --> 00:24:38,600
moves because she's not quite as
good at twerking as everyone

407
00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:42,280
else.
And that's when Bree tells

408
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:45,600
Marley that she and Jake had sex
after Marley decided that she

409
00:24:45,600 --> 00:24:50,560
didn't want to again, just to be
hurtful.

410
00:24:51,120 --> 00:24:53,120
Just cruelty.
Just cruelty.

411
00:24:53,120 --> 00:24:55,640
And the way she says it, too, is
this whole thing about, like,

412
00:24:55,960 --> 00:25:00,280
Jake having a mole on his hip
and all of this, like, just like

413
00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:02,760
that.
Is neat little like that.

414
00:25:02,760 --> 00:25:08,640
That was unnecessary.
Yeah, and not, not funny.

415
00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:12,920
Not that the scene should be
funny, but there were ways that

416
00:25:12,920 --> 00:25:20,800
Santana would break bad news or
or be mean in clever ways.

417
00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:25,720
Like the dialogue was clever.
I mean it's the dialogue was

418
00:25:25,720 --> 00:25:31,240
clever and Naya also just had a
talent for being emotionally

419
00:25:31,240 --> 00:25:36,760
like just like impactful when
changing would be but also

420
00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:39,640
fucking hilarious while
delivering the lines.

421
00:25:39,800 --> 00:25:42,720
Totally.
Like you got the multiple layers

422
00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:44,000
there.
There's only one layer with

423
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:46,440
three.
No offense to whoever the

424
00:25:46,440 --> 00:25:48,600
actress is, I have no idea what
her name is, but.

425
00:25:48,800 --> 00:25:50,360
No offense to you, whoever you
are.

426
00:25:50,400 --> 00:25:56,080
Yeah, so sorry you were not not
bringing it the way Naya.

427
00:25:57,400 --> 00:26:00,440
And like, so sorry that your
character was just like a third

428
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:02,000
copy.
Yeah, no.

429
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:05,200
And I'm, I'm sure you know what,
I think probably there were

430
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:08,240
plenty of times when Naya was
given absolute cardboard to redo

431
00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:11,840
and made something of it.
So yeah, not entirely the

432
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:15,480
actresses fault there.
Like, you can only do so much

433
00:26:15,480 --> 00:26:20,720
with this dialogue.
So Marley rightfully goes to

434
00:26:20,720 --> 00:26:22,880
confront Jake about what Bree
told her.

435
00:26:23,360 --> 00:26:25,800
And it's like, cheating on me
goodbye.

436
00:26:26,440 --> 00:26:30,640
And she walks off to go sing
Wrecking Ball.

437
00:26:31,760 --> 00:26:33,600
Yes.
This is her.

438
00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:36,080
This is her stand up auditorium
song.

439
00:26:37,040 --> 00:26:39,720
Yeah.
She gets the the spotlight in

440
00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:43,040
the auditorium.
Did did you like Wrecking Ball?

441
00:26:43,040 --> 00:26:47,680
It seemed it looked so cheap.
It really did.

442
00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:51,080
Like I it wasn't my favorite.
It was OK.

443
00:26:51,240 --> 00:26:52,720
Like the the Wrecking Ball was
OK.

444
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:58,200
Like I really like Melissa's
voice and I don't know, just

445
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:03,160
this.
The set looked so cheap and it

446
00:27:03,160 --> 00:27:06,120
was just them copy pasting the
video.

447
00:27:06,360 --> 00:27:09,920
Yeah.
Yeah, it it was pretty much just

448
00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:11,240
a recreation.
Yeah.

449
00:27:13,280 --> 00:27:16,440
So considering what we got with
What does the fox say, maybe,

450
00:27:17,400 --> 00:27:20,320
maybe they just stick stick to
recreating I.

451
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:23,320
Know.
Sorry, I'm so salty towards them

452
00:27:23,320 --> 00:27:23,920
today.
I don't know why.

453
00:27:23,920 --> 00:27:25,560
I think 'cause I was just
annoyed having to watch this

454
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:29,720
episode.
What's this show?

455
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:32,720
Yeah, I think, I don't know.
I don't know.

456
00:27:32,720 --> 00:27:34,720
Sometimes you're just like, why
did you do this?

457
00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:38,040
Yeah.
'Cause I don't dislike the song

458
00:27:38,040 --> 00:27:43,120
itself, but like putting her on
the the ball.

459
00:27:43,640 --> 00:27:47,640
It just looks.
It just looks so silly.

460
00:27:48,120 --> 00:27:52,680
It also like undercuts a moment
where I was genuinely feeling so

461
00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:54,800
bad for Marley.
And it was just.

462
00:27:54,960 --> 00:27:57,960
Like well, this is distracting.
It yes, you're like, oh, here's

463
00:27:57,960 --> 00:28:00,280
like an emotional moment where
her boyfriend's cheating on her

464
00:28:00,280 --> 00:28:05,600
and she already feels like shit
and and now she's swinging on a

465
00:28:05,720 --> 00:28:09,480
cardboard ball.
Poor Marley.

466
00:28:10,560 --> 00:28:13,880
Like don't Melissa her, yeah,
don't do this to Melissa.

467
00:28:14,280 --> 00:28:15,520
She doesn't need this shit from
you.

468
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:18,600
No.
Yeah.

469
00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:22,200
I will say I was just I I am
increasingly happy with any

470
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:24,240
episode where I don't have to
see Ryder a ton.

471
00:28:24,920 --> 00:28:27,720
This is true.
You're so right.

472
00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:31,120
That might be part of it too,
where you're like, what was

473
00:28:31,120 --> 00:28:32,840
going on?
Yeah, yeah.

474
00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:35,880
And.
That's like obviously not

475
00:28:35,880 --> 00:28:38,920
something I was judging anyone
on at the time it aired, but

476
00:28:38,920 --> 00:28:42,720
it's it's impossible to not
rewatch with that perspective.

477
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:46,960
Mm hmm, yeah, gotta love a
retrospective where you're like,

478
00:28:47,360 --> 00:28:48,920
look at this now.
Yeah.

479
00:28:49,200 --> 00:28:51,520
In hindsight, what was she
thinking?

480
00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:55,680
Yeah.
So we have a a final, a final

481
00:28:55,680 --> 00:29:00,560
bathroom moment where it's
during choir practice.

482
00:29:00,560 --> 00:29:03,400
This is maybe the most choir
practice they've done.

483
00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:06,160
Yeah, in a lot like they're
actually.

484
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:09,640
Yeah.
Practicing unique.

485
00:29:09,960 --> 00:29:12,720
So they're like the cameras,
like looking at that stupid ass

486
00:29:12,720 --> 00:29:18,120
porta potty and Unique is like
asking to use the the bathroom

487
00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:20,920
and she's gonna use that fucking
porta potty.

488
00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:26,280
And she's like, no, I've got
something better 'cause I'm the

489
00:29:26,320 --> 00:29:30,320
savior.
And offers to take Unique to the

490
00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:36,960
faculty bathroom.
And he has this like speech.

491
00:29:39,720 --> 00:29:43,520
It's like a aren't I awesome?
Yeah, it's very.

492
00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:49,640
Self congratulatory vibes there.
It was a self congratulatory and

493
00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:53,000
all I was thinking of is like
Unique is already doing all of

494
00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:56,520
the hard work to be herself in
this situation.

495
00:29:57,800 --> 00:30:01,920
And like you're stepping in and
being like, I'll give you a key

496
00:30:02,320 --> 00:30:04,920
like.
Yeah, you.

497
00:30:05,360 --> 00:30:07,840
You don't have to.
You shouldn't have to do this

498
00:30:07,840 --> 00:30:17,520
like Nah, yeah, I don't.
I found it an I think it was

499
00:30:17,520 --> 00:30:20,400
supposed to be very like, here's
a teacher stepping up for a

500
00:30:20,400 --> 00:30:26,160
student and trying to help when
no one else is helping and

501
00:30:26,160 --> 00:30:33,680
encouraging someone to do like
be yourself.

502
00:30:33,680 --> 00:30:37,520
You know, you keep fighting the
good fight, but she's like, she

503
00:30:37,520 --> 00:30:40,040
already has to.
She has to fight everything all

504
00:30:40,040 --> 00:30:42,440
the time.
She has no option but to fight

505
00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:44,960
that fight.
There, there's nothing else she

506
00:30:44,960 --> 00:30:47,960
can do.
It felt a little patronizing to

507
00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:50,160
me.
Yes, yeah, totally.

508
00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:53,680
And maybe the best thing that he
said was this.

509
00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:57,600
Like, no one needs to know how
you identify yourself, but like,

510
00:30:57,600 --> 00:31:03,440
you force her to by having heard
it come to you to ask to use the

511
00:31:03,440 --> 00:31:04,160
bathroom.
Yeah.

512
00:31:05,200 --> 00:31:09,480
That's a good point.
Like everyone, Like yeah.

513
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:13,800
Everyone's going to know because
she has to come to a teacher.

514
00:31:14,080 --> 00:31:18,080
So Sue sees this whole
interaction, goes down and

515
00:31:18,880 --> 00:31:23,760
apparently thinks it's degrading
to have to ask for the key, and

516
00:31:24,320 --> 00:31:28,480
offers to give Unique a key to
the faculty bathroom, but only

517
00:31:29,040 --> 00:31:35,040
if the student stopped working
because somehow twerking is so

518
00:31:35,680 --> 00:31:39,600
important to Sue.
And I think this is honestly, we

519
00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:43,520
all know that this is just a a
Sue plot to fuck with the Glee

520
00:31:43,520 --> 00:31:49,880
club, but it's up against
something as important as a

521
00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:52,160
student's identity.
Yeah.

522
00:31:52,240 --> 00:31:55,760
I mean, it's it's safety
insinuating some equivalency

523
00:31:55,760 --> 00:32:00,440
there that is definitely not.
Like like, your health and

524
00:32:00,440 --> 00:32:04,000
safety in this school is up
against dancing.

525
00:32:04,480 --> 00:32:07,280
Yeah.
And I'm gonna pit them against

526
00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:11,200
each other, like or not.
Yeah, or you could just not you

527
00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:12,600
just you just give unique the
key.

528
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:16,240
Yeah, you you could just give
Unique the key and fight this

529
00:32:16,240 --> 00:32:20,880
battle another way.
You don't have, you don't have

530
00:32:20,880 --> 00:32:23,800
to potentially put her in a
dangerous situation because you

531
00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:28,560
wanna get back at Shoe for
something again.

532
00:32:31,080 --> 00:32:33,760
Yeah.
And I sometimes I don't know if

533
00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:37,680
the writers of the show realize
they're making that equivalency

534
00:32:37,680 --> 00:32:40,480
or if they do and they're trying
to show that it's absurd.

535
00:32:42,400 --> 00:32:46,160
Yeah, like.
Like you guys know that this is

536
00:32:46,160 --> 00:32:48,560
stupid right?
Like these two things are not

537
00:32:48,560 --> 00:32:50,960
equal.
I feel like I might give them

538
00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:55,240
the benefit of the doubt if it
were this situation alone, but I

539
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:58,760
have a feeling I don't remember
it very well, but I have a

540
00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:00,800
feeling as we get into the beast
stuff.

541
00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:03,680
Oh God.
We're gonna see that this was a

542
00:33:03,840 --> 00:33:09,440
conscious decision being made.
Yeah, that's going to be awkward

543
00:33:09,440 --> 00:33:10,320
to talk about.
I.

544
00:33:10,320 --> 00:33:13,400
Think yes, yes.
I don't.

545
00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:21,000
Work I do, I know.
Anyway, she says no and then

546
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:25,840
throws a suicide rebellion as he
leaves the office throwing

547
00:33:25,840 --> 00:33:27,800
furniture all over the place.
And I actually really enjoyed

548
00:33:27,800 --> 00:33:30,040
that.
I was like, OK, that's funny,

549
00:33:30,840 --> 00:33:32,640
that's throwing shit all over
the place, good for you.

550
00:33:34,200 --> 00:33:36,920
And it seemed like he had a good
time doing it, so I had no

551
00:33:36,920 --> 00:33:38,520
complaints there.
Appropriate.

552
00:33:39,080 --> 00:33:46,680
That was appropriate.
And you know, the the end of the

553
00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:54,480
Glee club storyline is, you
know, talking about they shoe

554
00:33:54,480 --> 00:33:57,040
kind of is like, hey, we're not
going to twerk anymore because

555
00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:02,600
we're not gonna twerk anymore
because uniques safe.

556
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:05,040
You know, safety is more
important.

557
00:34:06,080 --> 00:34:08,320
Rebelling is one thing, but
betraying who we are is

558
00:34:08,320 --> 00:34:11,239
something else.
Like, didn't you realize that at

559
00:34:11,239 --> 00:34:12,679
the beginning?
Like we're not gonna twerk

560
00:34:12,679 --> 00:34:14,280
during nationals.
We all know this God.

561
00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:17,800
I hope not.
I hope that wasn't the shoe

562
00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:20,920
plan.
There is no shoe plan.

563
00:34:21,199 --> 00:34:23,320
They picked their songs the day
before.

564
00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:25,080
That's true.
That's true there.

565
00:34:25,480 --> 00:34:28,520
Is no plan an?
Actual plan.

566
00:34:29,080 --> 00:34:32,239
I, however, could not stop
looking at Blaine's outfit.

567
00:34:33,800 --> 00:34:36,679
Yeah.
Lavender Plants plants lavender

568
00:34:36,679 --> 00:34:40,960
pants, a rainbow Plaid shirt,
and a yellow bow tie.

569
00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:46,159
Who hurt you?
I mean, I, I do feel like at

570
00:34:46,159 --> 00:34:49,320
some point Darren Chris, just
like I don't know if he like

571
00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:53,480
fucked him and ran or what, but
he hurt someone in that

572
00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:54,880
costuming department.
He's like.

573
00:34:55,440 --> 00:34:58,440
Why like?
He pissed someone off.

574
00:34:58,960 --> 00:35:01,320
He complained about the hair gel
one too many times.

575
00:35:01,800 --> 00:35:04,320
And they were like, OK, it's
over now, baby.

576
00:35:04,720 --> 00:35:06,960
They were like, oh, you want to
see how much worse it can get?

577
00:35:09,120 --> 00:35:13,280
You thought this was bad, Just
you wait, motherfucker.

578
00:35:16,000 --> 00:35:18,960
And then they sing a song I had
never heard before called On Our

579
00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:20,840
Way as the group number at the
very end.

580
00:35:21,160 --> 00:35:24,640
I had also never heard this and
to be honest watching it back I

581
00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:26,120
was like I'm still not sure I've
ever heard this.

582
00:35:26,120 --> 00:35:28,760
I was.
Like, did this happen before?

583
00:35:28,760 --> 00:35:31,040
Yeah.
Or is this new?

584
00:35:31,440 --> 00:35:33,160
Is this new to the rewatch?
OK.

585
00:35:33,840 --> 00:35:36,000
Can't believe they inserted
entire songs.

586
00:35:36,160 --> 00:35:40,560
Damn Hulu streaming version.
Like, OK, I guess this didn't

587
00:35:40,560 --> 00:35:42,120
hit the charts.
Yeah.

588
00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:47,160
All right, OK, so I guess we
have to go all the way back to

589
00:35:47,160 --> 00:35:51,800
New York.
Yes, Rachel and her fucking

590
00:35:51,840 --> 00:35:54,000
funny girl shit.
Yeah.

591
00:35:54,840 --> 00:35:58,640
She is going to get a haircut
and wants to do a

592
00:35:58,760 --> 00:36:01,440
transformation.
She wants to look completely

593
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:05,840
different.
And I was like yeah OK whatever.

594
00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:13,800
She goes to rehearsal where she
has gotten a fuck ass Bob and

595
00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:18,680
everyone's pissed about this.
Like the director's going off

596
00:36:18,680 --> 00:36:22,080
about how he controls absolutely
everything about the production,

597
00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:26,920
and all I could think was she's
going to wear a wig for the show

598
00:36:26,920 --> 00:36:31,560
anyway.
Everybody in the production

599
00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:33,600
wears a wig, so.
What does it matter then?

600
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:37,840
What does it fucking matter?
Like that's that's what happens

601
00:36:37,840 --> 00:36:39,960
on stage.
Everyone wears wigs.

602
00:36:40,280 --> 00:36:44,280
Would will you wear wigs?
When will you wear wigs?

603
00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:47,240
When will you wear wigs?
Will you wear wigs?

604
00:36:48,440 --> 00:36:53,960
Maybe.
When will you wear wigs like

605
00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:55,400
they're?
Yeah.

606
00:36:55,920 --> 00:36:58,240
It they're gonna wear wig, What
does it matter?

607
00:36:58,240 --> 00:36:59,560
She could shave her fucking
head.

608
00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:05,840
It won't matter.
She and whatever his name is the

609
00:37:05,840 --> 00:37:09,120
guy who's playing the lead
across from her saying you are

610
00:37:09,120 --> 00:37:10,400
woman.
I am man.

611
00:37:10,400 --> 00:37:16,000
I hate this song.
I this performance to me is like

612
00:37:16,120 --> 00:37:18,240
kitsch.
I just don't enjoy it.

613
00:37:18,680 --> 00:37:21,480
I don't really like the the
musical anyway.

614
00:37:21,480 --> 00:37:25,280
Sorry.
I just, I just not for me, it's

615
00:37:25,320 --> 00:37:30,760
it I it doesn't spark joy.
So this performance, I was like,

616
00:37:31,080 --> 00:37:36,560
OK, yeah, I don't care.
So the director comes around to

617
00:37:36,560 --> 00:37:39,400
the haircut, but it doesn't
matter anyway because when she

618
00:37:39,400 --> 00:37:44,560
gets home to the loft, she
reveals that it was a wig

619
00:37:44,920 --> 00:37:48,080
anyway.
Plot twist.

620
00:37:48,080 --> 00:37:51,880
We all cried.
And I was like, as if Lea

621
00:37:51,880 --> 00:37:54,120
Michele would have cut her hair.
Yeah, really.

622
00:37:54,920 --> 00:38:01,520
You know, like, whatever.
And then she feels the need to

623
00:38:01,520 --> 00:38:06,840
tell Kurt that he is boring.
I mean, this man is just living

624
00:38:06,840 --> 00:38:10,240
his life.
Like he's going to work, he

625
00:38:10,240 --> 00:38:12,520
comes home, he's got a
boyfriend.

626
00:38:12,520 --> 00:38:15,120
Like it's just fucking living
his life.

627
00:38:15,120 --> 00:38:19,880
Let him do him.
I don't think he's he's not even

628
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:22,120
boring.
Like he's literally a student

629
00:38:22,760 --> 00:38:25,800
who has a job and
extracurriculars.

630
00:38:26,280 --> 00:38:29,560
Yeah, you're right.
He's got a he's got a band, he's

631
00:38:29,560 --> 00:38:32,120
got a fiance, and he goes to
school and to work.

632
00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:34,360
He ain't got no other hours in
his day.

633
00:38:35,160 --> 00:38:37,720
Like what does she expect him to
be doing to liven up his

634
00:38:37,720 --> 00:38:39,440
personality for her
entertainment?

635
00:38:39,960 --> 00:38:42,320
Apparently they're going to go
out and do something crazy of

636
00:38:42,480 --> 00:38:50,520
getting tattoos.
I, as someone with tattoos, I

637
00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:53,800
like other things.
When you're not an expert, like

638
00:38:53,800 --> 00:38:56,880
when you have the thing that
people depict on TV, you're

639
00:38:56,880 --> 00:38:58,640
like, that's not how that works.
Yeah.

640
00:38:59,120 --> 00:39:04,800
So the scene is just stupid.
What the the tattoo realism not

641
00:39:04,840 --> 00:39:07,800
hidden for you the.
Tattoo realism is not hidden for

642
00:39:07,800 --> 00:39:09,520
me.
Because it's non existent.

643
00:39:09,760 --> 00:39:15,760
It's it's just non existent.
Don't drink before you get a

644
00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:17,480
tattoo.
One, they probably won't do it

645
00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:21,560
if they catch you drinking.
Even this place, they're like,

646
00:39:21,560 --> 00:39:27,240
oh, it's a sketchy place.
Like, no, yeah.

647
00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:31,440
So Kurt gets something that he
says is both personal and

648
00:39:31,440 --> 00:39:34,240
political, and it's supposed to
say it gets better.

649
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:43,200
But what he has gotten is it
it's get better.

650
00:39:46,320 --> 00:39:52,520
And so the idea is that they,
like, went out and just got

651
00:39:52,520 --> 00:39:56,400
tattoos.
But then he says that he got a

652
00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:59,240
printing of it so the artist
would know what font he'd like.

653
00:39:59,640 --> 00:40:02,080
So that's not like, a random
decision.

654
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:04,800
Yeah.
So like.

655
00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:07,360
There was some premeditation
there.

656
00:40:07,400 --> 00:40:10,120
A little premeditation.
Apparently not premeditated

657
00:40:10,120 --> 00:40:12,360
enough because he was the one
who spelled it wrong.

658
00:40:14,280 --> 00:40:17,000
I mean, that's the kind of dumb
bleeping that I'm like, all

659
00:40:17,000 --> 00:40:20,680
right, that's fine.
That's that's funny.

660
00:40:22,040 --> 00:40:25,280
Yeah, he he and he also chose
really dumb font like what it

661
00:40:25,280 --> 00:40:29,720
hurt you work at Conde Nast
like.

662
00:40:29,920 --> 00:40:31,240
Yeah.
Stop it.

663
00:40:32,760 --> 00:40:37,640
Did you not ask Sarah Michelle?
Like what is happening so.

664
00:40:38,000 --> 00:40:40,680
If you have her at your
disposal, run everything by her

665
00:40:40,680 --> 00:40:44,360
verse.
You ask her what the appropriate

666
00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:49,680
font for a tattoo is.
And also like he had no bandage

667
00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:52,440
on it.
There was no swelling, it wasn't

668
00:40:52,440 --> 00:40:54,960
red at all.
Very pretty tattoo.

669
00:40:55,440 --> 00:40:59,080
Someone just took a fine pen to
his back.

670
00:40:59,080 --> 00:41:03,080
It's like, give it an attempt.
Would you give it a fucking

671
00:41:03,080 --> 00:41:07,560
attempt?
Rachel claims she went through

672
00:41:07,560 --> 00:41:15,280
with it, but or claims that she
didn't go through with it, but

673
00:41:15,280 --> 00:41:17,600
we find out later.
So.

674
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:23,920
Oh, so Kurt goes back to the
tattoo parlor because it's

675
00:41:23,920 --> 00:41:27,720
misspelled and he talks to this
artist and he's like, I wanted

676
00:41:27,720 --> 00:41:29,720
to rebel and shake off my
doldrums.

677
00:41:29,720 --> 00:41:31,880
Like, again, what doldrums are
you talking about?

678
00:41:31,880 --> 00:41:35,360
You are in school, you have a
job, you're in a band with a

679
00:41:35,360 --> 00:41:38,120
really cool dude and a really
cool chick.

680
00:41:38,520 --> 00:41:42,280
Also, your dad's a senator.
Your dad's a senator.

681
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:46,320
You're engaged.
Worker you've lived a lot of

682
00:41:46,320 --> 00:41:50,800
life in 1920 years Kurt like.
You've.

683
00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:54,120
Won mine the.
Glee Club Championship.

684
00:41:55,160 --> 00:41:58,160
You've been in New York for six
weeks.

685
00:41:58,160 --> 00:41:59,440
This.
Show.

686
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:04,840
What, so the artist is like,
yeah, I'm gonna fix it, but you

687
00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:08,000
gotta go more nuts.
And by going more nuts, I mean,

688
00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:09,880
you gotta get your tongue
pierced.

689
00:42:11,000 --> 00:42:15,840
Not a nose, not an eyebrow, not
your ear.

690
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:19,520
Which would make more sense.
Your tongue.

691
00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:26,600
Yeah.
Fucking stupid, stupid, stupid.

692
00:42:28,320 --> 00:42:33,240
So he gets his tattoo fixed to
say it's got Bette Midler, which

693
00:42:33,240 --> 00:42:36,880
I don't hate 'cause it's so I.
Know it's It's stupid enough

694
00:42:36,880 --> 00:42:38,040
that it works.
It's funny.

695
00:42:38,200 --> 00:42:39,400
It's stupid enough that it
works.

696
00:42:39,400 --> 00:42:41,440
I love Bette Midler, I can't be
mad about it.

697
00:42:45,000 --> 00:42:48,240
I remember people being a little
upset that it had nothing to do

698
00:42:48,240 --> 00:42:50,160
with Blaine.
Oh well, that's.

699
00:42:51,160 --> 00:42:55,480
But also like they're 19, their
wedding is stupid anyway.

700
00:42:56,240 --> 00:42:59,920
Everything about them getting
engaged at 19 is dumb.

701
00:42:59,920 --> 00:43:01,360
They don't mean to add.
Like.

702
00:43:02,160 --> 00:43:06,040
Body modification to it.
Like let them get married and

703
00:43:06,240 --> 00:43:10,680
figure out if this is going to
last anyway and then they can

704
00:43:10,680 --> 00:43:14,520
talk about bad idea tattoos.
But it's got Bette Midler is

705
00:43:14,520 --> 00:43:16,680
funny.
The tongue piercing.

706
00:43:16,680 --> 00:43:20,320
It's really.
Tall and she's never seen again,

707
00:43:20,360 --> 00:43:21,960
right?
Never seen again.

708
00:43:23,320 --> 00:43:27,360
Which is probably why it wasn't
an earring because they could

709
00:43:27,360 --> 00:43:30,040
just be like, oh we took it out.
I just think Kurt Hummel with an

710
00:43:30,040 --> 00:43:32,840
earring is funny.
That would have been funnier I.

711
00:43:32,880 --> 00:43:34,440
Think I think that would have
been kind of cute.

712
00:43:35,760 --> 00:43:40,000
It's the Nicholas Gallatzin era.
You just rock an earring all the

713
00:43:40,000 --> 00:43:44,840
time.
But yeah, so it it turns out the

714
00:43:44,920 --> 00:43:52,400
the Rachel did get a tattoo and
it's Finn's name up on her her

715
00:43:52,400 --> 00:43:55,600
ribs, which is very cute.
Yeah.

716
00:43:55,600 --> 00:43:57,440
It's hard to make fun of even
though like.

717
00:43:57,480 --> 00:43:59,800
Yeah, I have nothing for that
one.

718
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:02,040
Nothing.
Nothing to say about that one.

719
00:44:04,520 --> 00:44:09,680
Yeah, we'll take a pass on that.
Yeah, that that's the thing that

720
00:44:09,680 --> 00:44:12,520
Rachel gets the excuse on this
episode, nothing else.

721
00:44:13,240 --> 00:44:15,880
But like but also like where was
Santana?

722
00:44:15,880 --> 00:44:19,080
She would have gotten a tattoo.
Santana would have been like

723
00:44:20,120 --> 00:44:25,280
probably the responsible one to
check like Yelp reviews or call

724
00:44:25,280 --> 00:44:28,480
up her heavily tattooed friend
and be like recommend me a good

725
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:30,360
place.
Like recommend me somewhere that

726
00:44:30,360 --> 00:44:32,720
spells it right the first time.
That's why she couldn't be in

727
00:44:32,720 --> 00:44:34,920
the episode 'cause she actually
would have been too responsible,

728
00:44:35,040 --> 00:44:37,280
yeah, for the storyline to to
work.

729
00:44:37,560 --> 00:44:41,400
Yeah, that's you're so right.
Like not you guys.

730
00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:43,960
Yeah.
We're going to the good place,

731
00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:50,760
not the bad place.
So yeah, those are our very our

732
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:54,880
three.
I guess everyone was, well, no,

733
00:44:54,880 --> 00:44:57,960
not even everyone was letting
loose with the twerking and the

734
00:44:57,960 --> 00:44:59,920
tattoos.
But then Unique had a very

735
00:44:59,920 --> 00:45:07,080
serious storyline and.
Yeah, just a disjointed set of

736
00:45:07,160 --> 00:45:09,160
storylines.
Mishmash.

737
00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:13,400
Yeah.
I wonder what Naya was doing.

738
00:45:13,560 --> 00:45:17,360
Like why wasn't?
I miss her in the episode.

739
00:45:18,000 --> 00:45:21,600
I know.
I know I I, I definitely, again

740
00:45:21,600 --> 00:45:25,160
with the retrospect, I enjoy
Santana so much and I'm always

741
00:45:25,160 --> 00:45:26,440
watching her when she's on
screen.

742
00:45:27,120 --> 00:45:32,880
Yeah, me too.
The the trivia attached to this

743
00:45:32,880 --> 00:45:36,800
episode is apparently this is
the 4th episode to have a viewer

744
00:45:36,800 --> 00:45:39,520
discretion advised.
Really.

745
00:45:39,520 --> 00:45:42,280
Content reading?
And it was like, for what?

746
00:45:43,040 --> 00:45:44,280
What was it?
Yeah, what?

747
00:45:44,520 --> 00:45:46,600
I guess.
Quirking gender.

748
00:45:47,440 --> 00:45:51,440
Gender require.
I don't, I don't know.

749
00:45:52,160 --> 00:45:53,440
I mean.
No gender.

750
00:45:53,800 --> 00:45:57,080
Unique is in many more episodes.
I'm not sure if they're aware of

751
00:45:57,080 --> 00:46:00,600
that.
And she is always herself.

752
00:46:01,560 --> 00:46:04,920
Beware gender.
Yeah, scary, scary.

753
00:46:05,160 --> 00:46:08,560
And it's the it's the first
episode of Season 5 to not be a

754
00:46:08,560 --> 00:46:13,520
tribute episode.
OK, Yeah, thank God.

755
00:46:13,840 --> 00:46:16,520
Yeah.
It's too many tribute episodes.

756
00:46:16,520 --> 00:46:18,840
I remember that being an issue
in the like, hey, we get it.

757
00:46:19,080 --> 00:46:21,800
No more.
No more, no more tributes.

758
00:46:21,800 --> 00:46:26,880
Thank you very much.
OK, well that that is the

759
00:46:26,880 --> 00:46:32,880
episode.
Do you got anything else to add?

760
00:46:33,080 --> 00:46:37,000
Not really it wasn't.
I mean the unique storyline

761
00:46:37,000 --> 00:46:39,080
wasn't bad, but it wasn't great
either.

762
00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:42,720
Which again, is for Glee.
For a storyline like that, not

763
00:46:42,720 --> 00:46:45,000
bad.
Probably is the high bar that

764
00:46:45,000 --> 00:46:47,280
they have reached.
Yeah, like.

765
00:46:47,400 --> 00:46:49,320
Offensive.
They didn't, yeah, they didn't

766
00:46:49,320 --> 00:46:51,040
do anything horrifically wrong
in it.

767
00:46:51,080 --> 00:46:53,320
So I'm like, good job.
Yeah, totally.

768
00:46:53,320 --> 00:46:56,040
Yeah.
It just again, it's like to

769
00:46:56,040 --> 00:46:57,960
sandwich it between like silly
stuff.

770
00:46:58,640 --> 00:47:04,640
I I guess is how you make it,
not I don't know.

771
00:47:04,840 --> 00:47:06,800
I mean, this is what Glee does
though, so it's not like it's

772
00:47:06,800 --> 00:47:10,800
surprising.
I mean it, I don't know what

773
00:47:10,800 --> 00:47:13,480
else was airing on Fox at the
time, but it also might have

774
00:47:13,480 --> 00:47:14,920
been how do we get this on air
thing.

775
00:47:15,480 --> 00:47:20,000
That is very true.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

776
00:47:20,000 --> 00:47:23,200
I just, I hate when those kind
of storylines feel diminished

777
00:47:23,200 --> 00:47:24,720
because they're next to
twerking.

778
00:47:26,960 --> 00:47:28,640
You're like, actually, this is
something really important that

779
00:47:28,640 --> 00:47:32,320
people should talk about.
But also dancing.

780
00:47:32,680 --> 00:47:34,360
Like, all right, that's fine.
Oh my.

781
00:47:35,160 --> 00:47:38,680
God, I just saw that the next
episode is also silly.

782
00:47:39,840 --> 00:47:44,040
A tribute episode.
It is the the next two episodes

783
00:47:44,040 --> 00:47:47,360
are they're fine.
Yeah.

784
00:47:47,360 --> 00:47:49,400
Season 5 is buck wild.
I don't.

785
00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:53,680
I don't know how high the
writers room was, but it's not

786
00:47:53,680 --> 00:47:55,440
great.
Yeah, pretty high, I'm guessing.

787
00:47:56,680 --> 00:47:59,720
Do you have a favorite song?
Not really.

788
00:48:01,800 --> 00:48:06,960
I mean, just in terms of the
song, like she'd like.

789
00:48:06,960 --> 00:48:09,560
Melissa did a good job with
Wrecking Ball, but I.

790
00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:14,080
Don't know the.
Song I always want to.

791
00:48:14,240 --> 00:48:20,920
I came.
In like a regular I never hit so

792
00:48:21,200 --> 00:48:26,080
hard.
All I wanted was to break.

793
00:48:29,240 --> 00:48:40,280
All you ever did was, yeah, I
was going to say Wrecking Ball

794
00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:42,960
because I like Marley and
Melissa.

795
00:48:43,400 --> 00:48:49,480
Yeah, like unique song, like it,
it, it fit, but I still didn't

796
00:48:49,760 --> 00:48:51,440
enjoy it.
Yeah, yeah.

797
00:48:51,840 --> 00:48:53,200
So yeah, I'm going to go with
Wrecking Ball.

798
00:48:54,080 --> 00:48:57,920
Do you have any favorite lines
or anything that stood out I.

799
00:48:58,040 --> 00:49:02,160
Don't think much stood out to me
in this one.

800
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:09,920
The only thing I really wrote
down what the the teacher of the

801
00:49:09,920 --> 00:49:11,080
year?
What is this a typo?

802
00:49:11,280 --> 00:49:12,280
OK, that was good.
Yeah.

803
00:49:12,480 --> 00:49:15,880
I like that.
I was like, thank you.

804
00:49:15,880 --> 00:49:19,440
That is for.
Us yeah OK I'm going to steal

805
00:49:19,440 --> 00:49:23,400
that in just a second it.
And then because we're supposed

806
00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:25,960
to end these episodes on
something positive, what is that

807
00:49:25,960 --> 00:49:31,120
thing you like?
Oh, let's see, I mean I I like

808
00:49:31,160 --> 00:49:39,720
Sue stepping in for unique, even
if it was a like leverage thing.

809
00:49:40,880 --> 00:49:44,120
I like the Vine reference.
Vine.

810
00:49:44,640 --> 00:49:46,800
Yeah.
We miss you.

811
00:49:48,360 --> 00:49:51,120
And oh, I, I like that they
pointed out that Blurred Lines

812
00:49:51,120 --> 00:49:53,000
is about Dave, right?
Yeah.

813
00:49:53,600 --> 00:49:56,120
Like, yeah, at least some
self-awareness.

814
00:49:57,440 --> 00:50:01,400
Just a a smidgen of it.
And I, I, I will say I think

815
00:50:01,400 --> 00:50:05,440
that even if I didn't like all
the storylines, I think that

816
00:50:07,080 --> 00:50:10,080
Unique and Marley's scenes were
well acted.

817
00:50:10,720 --> 00:50:14,200
I love their friendship, yes.
Yeah.

818
00:50:14,240 --> 00:50:17,160
And I like that that continues.
I love their best, their

819
00:50:17,160 --> 00:50:18,760
besties.
I don't know if they're besties,

820
00:50:18,760 --> 00:50:21,080
but I'm gonna say it.
They seem like they should have

821
00:50:21,080 --> 00:50:24,240
been besties.
Yeah, yeah, I like them.

822
00:50:24,360 --> 00:50:25,800
There's So what about you?
What?

823
00:50:25,920 --> 00:50:27,120
What's the thing you like?
Aw.

824
00:50:28,120 --> 00:50:31,520
Man, I don't know.
You know, I I like that in the

825
00:50:31,520 --> 00:50:33,440
beginning, Blaine was just
chilling.

826
00:50:34,280 --> 00:50:35,840
Yeah.
Taking care of business.

827
00:50:35,840 --> 00:50:40,240
Like I don't know if he stayed
late to put chairs away but like

828
00:50:40,640 --> 00:50:43,480
I appreciate someone cleaning up
after themselves.

829
00:50:44,040 --> 00:50:46,360
Yeah.
So I'm going to say Blaine

830
00:50:46,960 --> 00:50:50,680
dancing on his own, just having
a good time.

831
00:50:50,920 --> 00:50:54,680
Tidying.
Tidying up like a good boy, yes.

832
00:50:55,360 --> 00:50:58,120
Not something I'm going to say.
That's a good one.

833
00:50:58,520 --> 00:51:01,680
Yeah, 'cause you know, you don't
have to leave that to other

834
00:51:01,680 --> 00:51:03,360
people to take care of.
You should do that.

835
00:51:03,600 --> 00:51:07,280
All right.
Well, this is the the end of the

836
00:51:07,320 --> 00:51:09,320
end, the the end of the end of
twerking.

837
00:51:12,560 --> 00:51:15,680
It's a a bit of a skip, I would
say.

838
00:51:15,680 --> 00:51:19,600
In the Canon, yeah.
Of not not a necessary rewatch

839
00:51:19,600 --> 00:51:20,960
if you're doing the best of
there.

840
00:51:20,960 --> 00:51:24,480
Yeah, you know, if I don't think
it's gonna crack your top 20,

841
00:51:24,720 --> 00:51:29,240
No, but you know, thanks for for
listening.

842
00:51:29,280 --> 00:51:32,280
You can find us on the Internet
on Phantom on the rocks.

843
00:51:33,640 --> 00:51:36,840
And if you want to find all our
bonus content, that's on

844
00:51:36,840 --> 00:51:42,240
patreon.com/phantom on the rocks
and we will catch you on the

845
00:51:42,240 --> 00:51:48,360
next episodes that are also kind
of silly mid season five.

846
00:51:48,440 --> 00:51:50,160
What the hell are they doing
episodes.

847
00:51:51,840 --> 00:51:54,760
And I guess that's what you
missed on twerking.

848
00:51:54,920 --> 00:51:57,760
You've been listening to Glee on
the Rocks, a Fandom on the Rocks

849
00:51:57,760 --> 00:51:59,880
podcast.
A huge thank you to our sound

850
00:51:59,880 --> 00:52:03,440
editor, Adriana.
For more episodes, subscribe on

851
00:52:03,440 --> 00:52:06,880
Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or
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852
00:52:07,120 --> 00:52:10,160
You can follow us on Instagram,
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853
00:52:10,160 --> 00:52:13,520
Internet at Fandom on the Rocks.
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854
00:52:13,520 --> 00:52:16,240
podcast, you can subscribe to
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855
00:52:16,240 --> 00:52:20,040
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856
00:52:20,040 --> 00:52:23,520
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857
00:52:23,520 --> 00:52:26,760
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858
00:52:27,160 --> 00:52:29,720
So until next time, that's what
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